I Miss Me

I miss me... darkness... silence... reserved peace... secluded... in my zone... wee hours of the morning... PAINTING. I miss not being able to sleep because the images of these Girls would visit me and talk to me and would not rest until she manifested, in real life, on canvas. I miss the details in their eyes... lips... lashes... accessories... hair... her Purpose... that moment of just she and me. I miss PAINTING all night and looking at the clock going IT'S TIME TO WAKE UP IN ONE HOUR.
I used to say I longed for the life when I lived- with the ocean as my backyard- and I'd sleep all day and PAINT all night. I still have that vision. I still want that life... that life where nothing matters but me, my canvasses, my PAINT, my PAINTbrushes and my Girls.
In between all the Blessings and responsibilities and duties and expectations of the Now, and enjoying these Phenomenal Opportunities,
I sketch out a minute
and shed a tear...
because I miss that me.